The biggest mistake people make in their careers (and lives)

The biggest mistake people make in their careers (and lives)The biggest mistake people make in their careers (and lives)A CareerBuilder surveyfound that 49% of all workers accept thefirst offer given to them.For people under 35, who are far less likely to negotiate, these numbers are surely much higher.Losing an extra few thousand dollars may leid seem like a big absprache. However, over a long enough period of time, small things become big things.Follow Ladders on FlipboardFollow Ladders magazines on Flipboard covering Happiness, Productivity, Job Satisfaction, Neuroscience, and moreAccording toan analysis by Salary.com, negotiating your initial salary and renegotiating every few years will earn you over $1 million more during your career.Heres the kicker, raises and future offers generally build on yourcurrent salary or lage?- ?which means your first mistake can haunt you for a long time.I had a conversation with Jeff Goins, best-selling author ofThe Art of Work, about 8 months ago . I asked his advice about publishing a book I wanted to write and he said,Wait. Dont jump the gun on this. I made that mistake myself. If you wait a year or two, youll get a 10x bigger advance, which will change the trajectory of your whole career.Most People CantWaitIn the famousStanford Marshmallow Experiment, four-year-old children were offered a treat of their choosing (an Oreo cookie, a marshmallow, or a pretzel stick). They were told they could have the treat now, or, if they waited 15 minutes and resisted temptation, they could have a second treat.So, for waiting 15 minutes, the kids who waited would get a 100% increase in their reward.Follow-up studies on these children later in life found that those who delayed gratification were more successful in generally all areas of life.Weve all heard this before. Yet, despite knowing about this famous study?- ?and the loads of research on willpower and self-control since?- ?fruchtwein people are still impulsive about their decision- making.The Wrong MotivationsThe reason most people fail to make the best long-term decisions is because they dont know what they really want.If you dont know what you want, of course youll take the best thing offered you.In his book,Good to Great,Jim Collins said,A once-in-a-lifetime opportunity is irrelevant if it is the wrong opportunity.According to Collins, most companies dont go from good to great because they lose track of their original intent.When you start to succeed (or get a degree, etc.), more opportunities come your way. Unless you know exactly what you are andwhat youre not, youll be easily swayed.Because most people havent decided what they intrinsically want, their primary motivation becomes external validation. Thus, rather than actuallybeing good,the objective is tolook as good as possible.Why do youreallywant to do what you are doing?Ryan Holiday, best-selling author ofThe Obstacle is the Way,told me that people write a book for one of two reasonsGet a book dealWr ite a book that does well long into the futureMost people trying to develop a writing career, if they were honest with themselves, want to get a book deal. Theyd sacrifice the long-term goal of writing a classic at the expense of merely becoming an author. The same is true of most people trying to start a business, or doing anything else.The problem is, in most cases, it doesnt go both ways. Holiday, for example, took a substantially smaller book contract for his book,The Obstacle is the Way,because the book welches on an unproven concept. But he was fine with the initial pay-cut because his goal was more long-term. He wanted to write a book that would continue to sell wellyears into the future.This is the exact opposite of how most people approach their goals. The goal for most people is to be a best-seller, or an entrepreneur, or a college grad. Its all about the image. The external validation becomes more important than truly doing great work.The Benefits of Delayed Gratification Holiday differs in one more way than most people in his space. He was offered a book contract for the book that would eventually becomeThe Obstacle is the Wayseveral years before he wrote the book.Of course, he was ecstatic He told his mentor, best-selling author Robert Greene, about it.Holiday recollects about that conversationRobert was as happy for me as everyone else, but he told me he didnt think I should do it. Not because it wasnt a good deal, but because I wasnt ready. Youre 22 years old, he reminded me. Are you sure you can speak from a place of real understanding about the subject matter, he asked? He told me that every day I was experiencing new things, that I was widening my understanding and authority on the topic by living, and improving as a writer. The book would be better the longer I waited was his nice way of saying It wouldnt be any good if it came out now. He advised me to pass.Unlike so many others, Holiday delayed gratification. He further explains that over t he next few years, hed learn things and have experiences allowing him tobecome the personthat could writeThe Obstacle is the Way.Could he have written a great book at age 22? Probably.Would it have been a classic? Probably not.The question isDo you really believe you could create a classic?Or, do you believe you can create something truly impactful?Rather than just starting a business, do you believe you can create something truly important?Do you really believe in yourself?This may sound like a trite question. But its serious.Of course, you believe you could create something. But Im talking about somethingreal.Something of enduring quality. Something truly great.Do you believeYOUcould do that? Or, would you rather create something quick and inferior, but that gives you a false sense of achievement?Said Tony RobbinsLife gives you exactly what you ask of it, no more and no less.You get in life what youre willing to tolerate. Its all about your personal standards.Most peopleget lessin lifethan theirpotentialbecause they have low standards for themselves and those around them.The greatest reward for delayed gratification is who you become. Its not necessarily about the work you do. More, its that you became someone who could do workat that level.Your work is a reflection of you. Who you become determines the quality of your work. The quality of your work influences the lives of other people.Youll Know When Its the RightTimeAn obvious objection, or question, you should be having right now isWhat if I wait too long?Waiting to act and delaying gratification are two completely different things. Perfectionism is not delaying gratification.Perfectionism is a disease that leads to procrastination and waiting.The time to act becomes painfully obvious, not only based on intrinsic feelings but also based onexternal demand. Its not enough to feel ready. There must beclear evidencethat you are ready. That can only occur by experience in the real world and not merely in your head.80% of Life is ShowingUpIn the book,The E-Myth Revisited Why Most Small Businesses Dont Work and What to Do About It,Michael Gerber explains that the natural thing for a new business to do is grow.Most people wonder if they will get any traction for their concept. This fear is legitimate but besides the point. If you start a business and work at it,it will grow.Most businesses fail when things start growing. They get too excited by future prospects and dont continue the technical and organizational stuff to support the growth. Of this, author and strategistGreg Mckeown has said,Why dont successful people and organizations automatically become very successful? Success is a catalyst for failure.You must balance 1) your plans for the future with 2) doing and improving the actual work (i.e., your products) and 3) keeping things well-managed.If you keep these three things balanced, your chances of successduring growthare substantially higher, Gerber explains.ConclusionIf youre willi ng to wait an extra year or two, the quality of your impact, as well as the quality of your life, could dramatically improve.You must first know what you want. Until you do, youll be swayed by the first offer you get.You must also knowwhyyou are doing what youre doing. Until you do, youll be more concerned about looking good than actually doing something of lasting and significant value.Expect that when you go into business, it is going to grow. When it does, dont get distracted by all the once-in-a-lifetime opportunities that come your way. Stay the course. When needed, delay the gratification for something good in order to create something truly great.Youll never regret that extra 6 months, or year, or few years you were investing in yourself. When the harvest comes in, youll look back with a satisfaction most people could never imagine.How I Turned $25,000 Into $374,592 In Less Than 6MonthsIve created a free training that will teach you how to become world class and successful at anything you choose.Access the free trainingherenowThis article first appeared on Medium.You might also enjoyNew neuroscience reveals 4 rituals that will make you happyStrangers know your social class in the first seven words you say, study finds10 lessons from Benjamin Franklins daily schedule that will double your productivityThe worst mistakes you can make in an interview, according to 12 CEOs10 habits of mentally strong people